Helltris 99
Tetris. What a wonderful game. Since childhood I always played it whenever I came to school and it's my favourite game of all time. I even remember when I got my Gameboy on my birthday with a copy of Tetris 2. I could not fathom how the concept would have evolved but here was I, utterly amazed that I could play it anywhere I wanted, even if the game was a little different, it was the day I truly declared myself as their number 1 fan. Those are truly fond memories that I will never recover, for I have seen what truly became of an innocent game of Tetris in this day an age. I can no longer see it the same way after what happened to me. It was on February of 2019 when I decided to switch jobs, it was terrifying, but a new experience nonethenless that left me with a lot of stress in my system. Yes, I was older, and no longer an active videogame player but a Gamer nonethenless at heart. I usually brought my dusty, old Gameboy to work in order to play anything I could while on breaks and on the trip, but nothing else when I got home, since I was exhausted or doing chores. Since I moved to town I could only find that dated Legend of Zelda game that brought no joy to me, or that children's game, Pokémon Yellow, that would shut down from time to time due to the worn out state of the cartridge. I couldn't find my Tetris 2 copy and it truly disheartened me since then. I could not see the lovely pieces falling onto place and then dissapearing upon lining up perfectly in a horizontal manner. I could not experience the exhilarating thrill that came with the rising speed of the falling blocks. I could not watch the revolutionary animations of a animal stone slab breaking whenever I defeated one of the AI, the only one friend I could brag my triumph to. It truly sank my heart that I could not play Tetris for so long. One day, that changed, however. Like a perfect game that had been ruined by an unfortunate placement of a piece in the wrong spot, I made a terrible mistake that would haunt me for the rest of my life. Ah yes, I found out about the Nintendo Switch and how it had some Tetris games released. I thought that it would be cool to have a next gen handheld game as my Gameboy was on it's last legs, and I had the money too. But I just wanted simple, old Tetris, not one that mixed some strange blobs into the mix. It felt like a betrayal of the core values of Tetris. Thus, I searched for the other option. The dreaded game known as Tetris 99, the test of skill I was looking for and where all true gamers would converge to challenge each other for the top. After driving through town, checking on several gaming stores in the process, I found myself out of luck, not finding a single copy, but nevertheless, I wasn't discouraged. Upon another hour of searching, I found a garage sale that was selling a lot of games and consoles for cheap. The strange looks of the old woman in her pajamas that sold me the copy of Tetris 99 was urging me to take it with me. She had had enough of the game that spiraled into an adiction for his husband, who now rests in peace. What was strange about this is that the copy was loose in a box for vintage casette tapes. And upon close inspection, it was on perfectly mint conditions - It must've been really new, but the sticker was torn off and the word "Tetris" was scribbled with a marker and in a sloppy manner. I did not mind, nor wondered why the lady was so strange, as I was thrilled to finally play Tetris again! When I got home, I finally prepared to play the game I so yearned to play for so long. I heard so many thing about the other games after the Gameboy ones and I truly was skeptical I would pick up another game other than Tetris due to how amazing each entry was turning up to be. So this had to live up to the standards, right? I turned off all the lights and locked myself in my room. Only the lit screen of my brand new Nintendo Switch would be what lightens up the room. And there it was, the beautiful Tetris 99 logo greeting me once I booted it up for several seconds. But something was off when I pressed the start button. The game did not respond. I tried doing it again, to see if that had any result, but nothing. Maybe my controller was broken, I thought to myself, until the screen turned black for 3 seconds approximately, and for that brief moment, I saw the title screen change. The title of the game was "Helltris 99" all of the sudden, the background was of an hyperealistic blood red, and T in the back was made of a creepy bonelike surface that you could feel as if it was a real skeleton. I was in shock to see such a thing, but it did not discourage me from seeing further, for I was getting extremely curious. I was greeted with a crude menu much like in the original game, with only one option selectable: "Play". I choose said option and I felt the Switch rumble with the screen flashing white for a moment. What an odd feature I thought. And then I was greeted with main screen of the game. I could see the grey box that filled me with an immense happiness and excitement. I would finally play Tetris again, as an orange sign that said "Waiting..." warned me that other players would come. Although several minutes had passed, no grey rectangles where in sight. I was starting to get worried that people in the internet would not want to play with me. Then I heard a voice mumbling, so chilling yet so intriguing. Elegant, but whimsical, as if an agent of mischief sent from the very depths of the pits of hell. I will never forget their words. They said: "The Pentamino is watching you, the deadliest piece conceived by fire and brimstone that will take 666 souls from each loser of this game. You have been chosen by the Tetris Devil himself to fight for your lives in a Battle Royale, and whoever wins will survive. Welcome to Helltris 99, now you will die." This is all I could remember, for the details are fuzzy. However, this was when I realised that my copy was not a real copy, but perhaps a HACKED game. But hacking was not possible for the advanced engineering masterpiece that brought us the Nintendo Switch to my knowledge, much less something that could do a thing like this. I was terrified, yes, and I wanted to get out of my room and turn on the lights, but I couldn't, as I felt curious, and worried. I could not turn off the game either, because otherwise the hyperealistic blood on the screen could potentially stain my sweaty palms, to which I would not be able to take such stains out easily for when I go to work. They would laugh at me for being a Gamer should they find out I had blood in my hands. The background turned bloody red and the grey boxes turned solid black. Now I witnessed how the place was getting crowded, with each grey box containing the player's terrified looks as they played the game, like a low quality facecam on dialup. Soon, the pieces start falling without warning. I gasped upon witnessing the T shaped piece crawling it's way down. This wasn't the Tetris I loved, for I was fighting for my life. My instincts would naturally come back to me as I readied a double line and sent the attack towards another player. They screamed, as if it truly hurt, but I kept pushing on in spite of this, as I was helplessly kept playing with no other choice. The bonelike colorless pieces kept falling and I even managed to get in a Tetris. However, someone directed their attack to me, and I felt a mosquito sting on my back, bloodcurling screams from such level of pain echoing through my room. We were all feeling what damage we caused in the deadliest war we could've been thrown into. And then... Then I saw the first one to fall. The grey box crumbled to ashes with a painful shriek as the soul of the poor Player who was defeated simply melted. A picture of the cursed Pentamino began to default dance on the space left, hyperealistic blood leaking from the screen of my Nintendo Switch for several second. It was the blood of the Player, as the Pentamino laughed like the character Ganondorf from The Legend of Zelda 2: Link's Awakening for the NES, available for download on the Nintendo Switch's eShop, right now. We 98 players that remained could only watch in horror as a fellow Tetris comrade falls, one that we will miss deeply, as we strive on to kill each other in order to survive and leave this cruel memory behind. One by one the gamers fell, in such a brutal spectacle as they could only direct the attacks to one another. One was in despair, begging us to let him stack his Tetrominos in peace instead of attacking him relentlessly for he was too tired to continue. One went mad with power, stacking his lines in the right way to wait for the long stick that would never come and spelled out his doom. I was missing an arm, but I still kept pushing on, using my feet to play instead, after so many years of Tetris, it all came naturally as I chose to do so. The pieces fell at a breakneck pace that I've never saw in any games for I have never gone past level 3 of Tetris in any of them, every now and then making a wet sounds due to the slippery blood that dripped whenever one piece came. It was astounding to witness, and I thought I was going to lose, as my zone stacked without an opening, and my arm and head were cut off. No, not when I was so close, as one of the last 5 remaining. I wouldn't let the Pentamino Demon take over my Gamer soul. It came down to my determination as a miracolous T-Spin put me once again in the lead, and condemned three others, leaving me one on one with the remaining player, a young boy of my age which such passion in his way of stacking the blocks to form the lines that would be my death sentence. But like a miracle it came a long, straight, firmly erect block that would give me my last chance of survival. I let it thrust with full force into my perfectly alinged stack, allowing it to penetrate with such an ungodly force that it sends tremors to my very being, filling me with a sense of peace and relief in my very peing as it drills through. As it came, with an ecstasic jingle it vanishes along the lines it enraptured, sending the beastly attack towards my opponent and destroying his soul. I had rised victorious. The Pentamino suddenly appeared on my screen, dripping blood with souless, pitch black eyes. It shrieked in a high pitched noise that could've left me deaf. And then suddenly, I convulsed due to the fatal overstimulation, falling off of the bed unconcious. When I woke up, I saw that the Switch was torn apart, and so was my game. It seemed as if it exploded from the inside out, which creeped me out, as it stinked a burning scent. But I didn't care for I was happy, as I defeated the demon. I will never forget the horrible experience that I had to go through. Now that I have thrown away the game and the Switch, I can play with my Gameboy once more and my old game of Tetris 2 to forget the pain that I had gone through as a Gamer. But everytime I play Tetris 2, however, I feel the Pentamino calling my name. He wants me to be it's grim reaper, but I refuse. It will have to wait until I pick up the game again. Especially as I only have my feet with me. So for now, I must say goodbye, Pentamino, my dear friend. See you in Helltris. - John Tetris Category:Pastas Category:Gamepasta Category:Crappypasta.com